The Upside of Anger.
'Anger and resentment can stop you in your tracks. That's what I know now. It needs nothing to burn but the air and the life that it swallows and smothers. It's real, though - the fury, even when it isn't. It can change you... Turn you... Mold you and shape you into something you're not. The only upside to anger, then... Is the person you become. Hopefully someone that wakes up one day and realizes they're not afraid to take the journey, someone that knows that the truth is, at best, a partially told story. That anger, like growth, comes in spurts and fits, and in its wake, leaves a new chance at acceptance, and the promise of calm. Then again, what do I know? I'm only a child.'
Its a quote from this great movie, 'The Upside of Anger'. I love it, is one of those movies that a girl watches when she's so mad, so upset that everything hurts, that all you can do is just sit and let your mind follow the movie. At the end you realize just what this quote says, that eventually, anger subsides, that things calm down and you get back to normal and you start to pick up the pieces and rebuild.
I wasn't particularly angry today, I was eating my lunch and saw that it was on and just watched. As you have probably read recently, things in the wonderful world of Jamie have been a bit shaken up. I think it was because I was tired and stressed. I've since picked myself back up and dusted off and I'm back on the road again, good as new. Still though, having watched this movie I've realized what that anger, disappointment and frustration has done to me. The past few weeks have been riddled with little bullets straight to my heart and where I normally don't let things bother me so much, I seemed to have let my guard down and I've taken some pretty direct hits. Its not something I'm proud of. I read recently of one of my friends speaking of the "Jackie O" facade, I knew other people hid behind smiles and laughter but I guess I didn't realize how hard sometimes it is. Its been a real learning experience for me, these past few weeks.
I've seen the effects anger has on me, the way it taxes my mind and my heart, the way it paints a dark shadow over me every day as I walk through my life. I always knew it was there, hiding behind little words, phone calls that I couldn't pick up because I knew I would cry, little messages here and there. I realize now that this was just one more way God was trying to show me something. I kept praying for peace and calm and God denied this, He, in His infinite wisdom and knowledge, knew that if I didn't face what was happening to me, didn't take the courage and time to really look at what I was feeling, to understand how I was letting it tear my soul into pieces then I would never learn what He had in mind for me to learn. Its hard to look back, I'm a humble person, but I tend to raise myself up where it concerns my bravery and pride. I try to be the strong girl, the one who doesn't cry in front of people, the one with the straight face, even in the midst of unbearable pain, I try to be Jackie O. I go with it, I smile, I laugh and even though my world is falling down around me I don't let the facade crack until I'm alone and hidden.
Why is it that we make life so hard?I've seen the direct effects anger has on people, the feuds, the jabs of words and insults. Seen what it does to both parties. Destroys one inside, pierces the heart of the other. We're so quick to let our anger pour out of us, to boil over, and when the damage is done, when the bombs have fallen and the fires have burned we stand back and let unforgiviness and pride keep us from seeing what the original cause was. We don't like that we were wrong, we don't like to acknowlege that others were hurt in the crossfire, but most of all we don't like to know that when all is said and done, that we did it. We hurt, we burned, we said those words, we, not another, we did. So we let it destroy us inside, eating away at us, like a cancer, too prideful to let go, to hurt to let another in to help. We just sit and burn until we're nothing but cinders and smoke.
We're quick to forget what anger has wrought on the world. One man was so angry at the Jews because they killed Christ that he set out to undertake a genocide the like of which the world had never seen before and never since, Hitler single handedly began a campaign of terror and ethnic cleansing the brought the world to its knees. We like to remember 9-11, we like to remember that Arabs flew planes into OUR buildings and killed OUR people on OUR soil, but we're quick to forget the thousands and thousands that have died in the ensuing war. We forget that immidiately following the attacks on the twin towers that people let blind rage overcome them and innocent arab citizens in citys around the US were dragged from their homes and tortured and killed, simply because of the anger of a few. Were they wrong in what they did, absolutely. Did we need to stop terrorists from taking shots at us as a country? Absolutely, but, were we so proud and strong as the Children of God to wage a war on a diffrent front? One that most people choose not to see. Following 9-11 "Christians" the world over started throwing the blame, we ran through the villiage, as it were, and set fire to every other house of religion in the world that wasnt our own. We wrote books about Islam and its sinful hell going ways, we turned our heads from the truth that the Bible speaks to us, that we are to love our nieghbors as ourselves. We were so quick to judge, to damn a whole culture to hell for the actions of a few. Did we take a look? Did we take the chance to look at the upside of anger? Did we take the opportunity to let our anger subside and react in a way that would truly show us to be what we are? Christians, Children of God, Members of His Chosen Nation? What do we call ourselves? Baptists, Methodist, Catholics, Muslims, Buddhists, Taoist? Did we stop to think that maybe, just mabye God has as many faces and names as we do as the human race? We were so quick to burn, to throw fire, but did we stop to think that maybe we were wrong? That we let anger cloud our vision?
We forget to look and see the upside of anger. The possibilities that happen when the fires are put out and the rains have washed away all the ruins. Where bridges were burned, others can rise up, where hearts were torn, new love can be born. We don't see the forest for the trees, or the phoenix that rises from the ashes to be born again. We say it hurts to much, we say we're not ready, we say we'll never heal or that they'll never talk to us again. We're quick to judge the good away. If we only stopped to realize that in the end, things are ok, then maybe we would see more clearly where the path picks up.
I think if we looked closely, and really stopped to think about what has happened we'll see what we were supposed to learn in the first place. That people forgive, that hearts heal, that friendships, true friendships weather out even the most ferocious of storms and that, most importantly, what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger. If we stop and look at the upside of anger, we'll see that, just as the quotes says, it comes in spurts and fits, that it always goes away, and that, in the end, new possibilities arise. A new chance to see the world for what it is, to see the beauty in life, that without suffering, without sacrifice, life would be a sad and lonely place, full of cowards and the ignorant. If we really see what Christ saw in us, that suffering is beauty, that a lesson is always learned, that forgiveness is always there, we need only ask it, then maybe, just maybe, we'd get the true answer to the riddle of life. Love will come and go, friends will come and lift us up only to be replaced by others, rains will come and end the droughts and put out the fires, but forgiveness and peace are only a prayer away. At the end of the day, Someone, no matter who you are, what you've done, or what you call Him, loves you when you go to sleep, Someone cares that you wake up in the morning, that you are loved unconditionally and nothing, NOTHING can take that away.
Its a quote from this great movie, 'The Upside of Anger'. I love it, is one of those movies that a girl watches when she's so mad, so upset that everything hurts, that all you can do is just sit and let your mind follow the movie. At the end you realize just what this quote says, that eventually, anger subsides, that things calm down and you get back to normal and you start to pick up the pieces and rebuild.
I wasn't particularly angry today, I was eating my lunch and saw that it was on and just watched. As you have probably read recently, things in the wonderful world of Jamie have been a bit shaken up. I think it was because I was tired and stressed. I've since picked myself back up and dusted off and I'm back on the road again, good as new. Still though, having watched this movie I've realized what that anger, disappointment and frustration has done to me. The past few weeks have been riddled with little bullets straight to my heart and where I normally don't let things bother me so much, I seemed to have let my guard down and I've taken some pretty direct hits. Its not something I'm proud of. I read recently of one of my friends speaking of the "Jackie O" facade, I knew other people hid behind smiles and laughter but I guess I didn't realize how hard sometimes it is. Its been a real learning experience for me, these past few weeks.
I've seen the effects anger has on me, the way it taxes my mind and my heart, the way it paints a dark shadow over me every day as I walk through my life. I always knew it was there, hiding behind little words, phone calls that I couldn't pick up because I knew I would cry, little messages here and there. I realize now that this was just one more way God was trying to show me something. I kept praying for peace and calm and God denied this, He, in His infinite wisdom and knowledge, knew that if I didn't face what was happening to me, didn't take the courage and time to really look at what I was feeling, to understand how I was letting it tear my soul into pieces then I would never learn what He had in mind for me to learn. Its hard to look back, I'm a humble person, but I tend to raise myself up where it concerns my bravery and pride. I try to be the strong girl, the one who doesn't cry in front of people, the one with the straight face, even in the midst of unbearable pain, I try to be Jackie O. I go with it, I smile, I laugh and even though my world is falling down around me I don't let the facade crack until I'm alone and hidden.
Why is it that we make life so hard?I've seen the direct effects anger has on people, the feuds, the jabs of words and insults. Seen what it does to both parties. Destroys one inside, pierces the heart of the other. We're so quick to let our anger pour out of us, to boil over, and when the damage is done, when the bombs have fallen and the fires have burned we stand back and let unforgiviness and pride keep us from seeing what the original cause was. We don't like that we were wrong, we don't like to acknowlege that others were hurt in the crossfire, but most of all we don't like to know that when all is said and done, that we did it. We hurt, we burned, we said those words, we, not another, we did. So we let it destroy us inside, eating away at us, like a cancer, too prideful to let go, to hurt to let another in to help. We just sit and burn until we're nothing but cinders and smoke.
We're quick to forget what anger has wrought on the world. One man was so angry at the Jews because they killed Christ that he set out to undertake a genocide the like of which the world had never seen before and never since, Hitler single handedly began a campaign of terror and ethnic cleansing the brought the world to its knees. We like to remember 9-11, we like to remember that Arabs flew planes into OUR buildings and killed OUR people on OUR soil, but we're quick to forget the thousands and thousands that have died in the ensuing war. We forget that immidiately following the attacks on the twin towers that people let blind rage overcome them and innocent arab citizens in citys around the US were dragged from their homes and tortured and killed, simply because of the anger of a few. Were they wrong in what they did, absolutely. Did we need to stop terrorists from taking shots at us as a country? Absolutely, but, were we so proud and strong as the Children of God to wage a war on a diffrent front? One that most people choose not to see. Following 9-11 "Christians" the world over started throwing the blame, we ran through the villiage, as it were, and set fire to every other house of religion in the world that wasnt our own. We wrote books about Islam and its sinful hell going ways, we turned our heads from the truth that the Bible speaks to us, that we are to love our nieghbors as ourselves. We were so quick to judge, to damn a whole culture to hell for the actions of a few. Did we take a look? Did we take the chance to look at the upside of anger? Did we take the opportunity to let our anger subside and react in a way that would truly show us to be what we are? Christians, Children of God, Members of His Chosen Nation? What do we call ourselves? Baptists, Methodist, Catholics, Muslims, Buddhists, Taoist? Did we stop to think that maybe, just mabye God has as many faces and names as we do as the human race? We were so quick to burn, to throw fire, but did we stop to think that maybe we were wrong? That we let anger cloud our vision?
We forget to look and see the upside of anger. The possibilities that happen when the fires are put out and the rains have washed away all the ruins. Where bridges were burned, others can rise up, where hearts were torn, new love can be born. We don't see the forest for the trees, or the phoenix that rises from the ashes to be born again. We say it hurts to much, we say we're not ready, we say we'll never heal or that they'll never talk to us again. We're quick to judge the good away. If we only stopped to realize that in the end, things are ok, then maybe we would see more clearly where the path picks up.
I think if we looked closely, and really stopped to think about what has happened we'll see what we were supposed to learn in the first place. That people forgive, that hearts heal, that friendships, true friendships weather out even the most ferocious of storms and that, most importantly, what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger. If we stop and look at the upside of anger, we'll see that, just as the quotes says, it comes in spurts and fits, that it always goes away, and that, in the end, new possibilities arise. A new chance to see the world for what it is, to see the beauty in life, that without suffering, without sacrifice, life would be a sad and lonely place, full of cowards and the ignorant. If we really see what Christ saw in us, that suffering is beauty, that a lesson is always learned, that forgiveness is always there, we need only ask it, then maybe, just maybe, we'd get the true answer to the riddle of life. Love will come and go, friends will come and lift us up only to be replaced by others, rains will come and end the droughts and put out the fires, but forgiveness and peace are only a prayer away. At the end of the day, Someone, no matter who you are, what you've done, or what you call Him, loves you when you go to sleep, Someone cares that you wake up in the morning, that you are loved unconditionally and nothing, NOTHING can take that away.
'Nothing can be done against the truth
No matter how we remain in denial
Wasting time
Replacing time
With each empty excuse
But that'll only work a little while
Coping with despair
Knowing you're not there
Ashamed to just admit
I've been a fool
So I blame it on the Son
Run away from everyone
Hoping to escape this ridicule
Trapped in misery
Wrapped so miserably
In this deception that i'm wearing like a skin
Dying to maintain
Oh I keep trying to explain
A heart that never loved me to begin
Oh I'm such a mess
I have no choice but to confess
That I've been desperately trying to belong
Lying to myself
And everybody else
Refusing to admit my right was wrong
How beautiful is fruit still in denial of its roots?
My guilty heart behaved so foolishly
This treason from within
That reasons with my sin
Won't be happy til it sees the death of me
Selfishly addicted
To a life that I depicted
Conflicted cuz it's not reality
Oh what's left of me
I beg you desperately
Cause me to agree with what I know is best for me
Please save me from myself
I need You to save me from myself
Please save me from myself so I can heal
The choices that I've made
Oh have been nothing but mistakes
What a wasted use of space
Should I die before I wake?
In all of my religion
I've fortified this prison
Obligated to obey
The demands of bad decisions
Please save me from myself
I need You to save me from myself
Please save me from myself so I can heal
And then He came
Selah
And it means
Praise and meditation
And then He came
Selah
And it means
Did you think about that?
And then He came
Selah
Oh and it means
Meditation
And then He came
Selah
Oh and it means
That it is sealed'
-'Selah', Lauryn Hill
No matter how we remain in denial
Wasting time
Replacing time
With each empty excuse
But that'll only work a little while
Coping with despair
Knowing you're not there
Ashamed to just admit
I've been a fool
So I blame it on the Son
Run away from everyone
Hoping to escape this ridicule
Trapped in misery
Wrapped so miserably
In this deception that i'm wearing like a skin
Dying to maintain
Oh I keep trying to explain
A heart that never loved me to begin
Oh I'm such a mess
I have no choice but to confess
That I've been desperately trying to belong
Lying to myself
And everybody else
Refusing to admit my right was wrong
How beautiful is fruit still in denial of its roots?
My guilty heart behaved so foolishly
This treason from within
That reasons with my sin
Won't be happy til it sees the death of me
Selfishly addicted
To a life that I depicted
Conflicted cuz it's not reality
Oh what's left of me
I beg you desperately
Cause me to agree with what I know is best for me
Please save me from myself
I need You to save me from myself
Please save me from myself so I can heal
The choices that I've made
Oh have been nothing but mistakes
What a wasted use of space
Should I die before I wake?
In all of my religion
I've fortified this prison
Obligated to obey
The demands of bad decisions
Please save me from myself
I need You to save me from myself
Please save me from myself so I can heal
And then He came
Selah
And it means
Praise and meditation
And then He came
Selah
And it means
Did you think about that?
And then He came
Selah
Oh and it means
Meditation
And then He came
Selah
Oh and it means
That it is sealed'
-'Selah', Lauryn Hill
posted by Jamie | 12:01 PM
5 Comments:
Very interesting topic. We were talking in Bible study last weekend about how you can be angry, but not sin (Ephesians 4). I think it's OK and natural to be angry over things ilke sin and injustice. However, it is so easy to let that turn into sinful anger directed at a person and seek revenge, hold a grudge, etc.
But, I think situations that make us mad, upset, etc. can be great teachers. Sometimes it takes difficulty for God to get through to us.
I agree, thats why I choose this topic for the new post, most people dont see that there is an upside to anger, there is, anger leaves a wake, and when the rains come and wash away all the bad that has happened, its a time for renewal and a fresh start, I think if more people recognized this then things would be less emotionally charged and revenge and things like that would become things of the past.
God chooses hardships to teach us lessons all the time, we're called to be servents and to suffer as He suffered for us, so I definitly aggre, that these situations can be great teachers.
I'm going to pull issue with your sentence "Did we stop to think that maybe, just maybe God has as many faces and names as we do as the human race?" Perhaps I am misunderstanding you, but I don't think Allah or Buddha or Joseph Smith etal are God. There is only one. So correct me if I've misunderstood you my dear!
Many valid points. I agree on many if not most, and not to be an entire rebuttal, but 9-11. We were attacked on our soil by supposed "Arabs".
But did we not take their lives first? But thena gain if we trace this feud back so many years did the Britains, our ancestors (of sorts), not fight their ancestors and draw blood? The blame game can be pushed back as far as we want, but whats the point of a scapegoat? Doesn't solve anything.
I guess the key thing I'm trying to say is, sweating the small stuff shouldn't be a problem (as you have previously identified)(let by-gones be by-gones and forget your anger) yet sadness hits us all. It happens. We can't all be Jackie-O and to tell you the truth I have yet to meet one of her kind.
Yet playing the blame game gets no one anywhere. So we just need to step back, address our emotions and rationally analyze the situation and go, "Now what the heck can we do to rectify this situation?" That seems to fit, mostly.
And for the record I have studied Christianity, Buddhism, Taoism, and assorted other religions. While I feel the mask of the religious leader is changed each time, a certain nugget of truth can be found within each faith that bears the same resemblance as that of Our Lord.
A very valid point indeed! I agree, It brings me back to one of my favorite movies, 'Kingdom of Heaven'. There is a quote in the movie that I feel is very relevent...
'It has fallen to us, to defend Jerusalem, and we have made our preparations as well as they can be made. None of us took this city from Muslims. No Muslim of the great army now coming against us was born when this city was lost. We fight over an offence we did not give, against those who were not alive to be offended. What is Jerusalem? Your holy palaces lie over the Jewish temple that the Romans pulled down. The Muslim places of worship lie over yours. Which is more holy? The wall? The Mosque? The Sepulchre? Who has claim? No one has claim. All have claim!
We defend this city, not to protect these stones, but the people living within these walls. '
I like this quote because it holds true to this and all situations. None really have claim, yet all have claim. Its not the claim on a certian amount of land that is important, it is the people within those lands. People are dying for claims and attrocities that where not in their own lifetimes. revenge is a human desire and anger with it. It is important for us to overcome this and look at the situation with logical and understanding eyes.
Its like I said in the entry, the people who get caught in the cross fire are the ones who suffer the most, Its important for us to allow ourselves time for healing and understanding. Alot of what is happening in the middle east and as a result of 9-11 is because we were swift in our retrobution, but not in our understanding. God is in everything, Its a basic belief in all religions, where its the One God or many gods, understanding and compassion is something that should be paramount.
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